Respectful and Honest Communication

Self-confidence in healthy relationships

“Relationships thrive in an environment of emotional safety, openness, and authenticity. This means that both people involved need to feel safe with each other, be safe for each other, and be willing to express themselves openly and authentically.” Tiny Buddha

The summer’s energy offers an opportunity to examine relationships in their entirety, both positive and negative. It is essential to allow ourselves to engage with supportive and nurturing individuals while also taking the time to care for our own well-being. By fostering self-love and acceptance, we can attract healthier and more fulfilling relationships.

From my experience as Practitioner, most people are taught that in order to have a relationship, it not safe to express themselves or share their feelings. We believe that our feelings are a problem for others and expressing them would threaten the relationship.

The quote above is one of my favorites “Tiny Buddha” and I decided to share my thoughts, and I will address what to do when faced with situations of disregard and gain a better understanding of synergistic communication.

Even when people are choosing to be a part of our lives, they sometimes exhibit dismissive or superior behaviors toward us, and which can feel like we are an imposition on their lives. These behaviors can play out as passive - aggressive such as strong opinions, sarcasm, correcting, irritation and frustration. When this happens, we can react by overcompensating, constantly apologizing, or being more passive. Unfortunately, most of the time they assume that this behavior is not noticed or felt by others. When we do notice and speak up, often “just kidding or just joking” is a response that allows the convenience of not taking responsibility for their behavior. Let’s discuss how to handle these awkward interactions.

We have learned that maintaining a relationship requires careful communication and sometimes withholding certain personal expressions. It is important to engage in constructive dialogue to address how we feel about this behavior. However, it must be noted that conversations may not always advance smoothly. While we may not want to speak up because approaching these behaviors may result in hurt feelings, conflict or resentment.

An alternative approach to resolving conflicts amicably is to demonstrate genuine self-confidence, rather than participating in unproductive discussions with these individuals. Although it is natural for humans to react to one another, confident individuals avoid the cycles of judgment or victimization that involve feeling inferior or superior. Self-assured individuals are aware of their values and abilities therefore don’t take the behavior of others personally. Self-confidence is our natural state of being where there is no need to diminish others in order to boost self-esteem. Self-confident individuals avoid comparing themselves to others and do not need their validation.

As I understand it, superiority complex involves the belief that one's abilities or knowledge are considerably greater than those of others. These behaviors have become increasingly apparent to me, the older I get. As a holistic practitioner, I have focused on observing, sensing, and understanding the behaviors of others. Through this insight, I believe that much of our communication transpires indirectly, and energetically through the signals conveyed by how others treat us and how we allow ourselves to be treated.

I believe by intuitively and consciously tapping into and trusting the subtle cues of what we see, sense and feel whether spoken or un-spoken, we will be more successful in navigating in all our interpersonal relationships, allowing us to stay empowered, and respond without being triggered. When consciously focused on managing our own reactions and setting healthy boundaries, we can create a more positive experience.

By practicing honesty and addressing negative interactions with positive communication and self-confidence, we can cultivate healthier relationships. This approach also enhances our confidence in our interactions and reinforces self-assurance that we can handle any situation gracefully and stand in our power authentically.

Mantra: I give myself permission to be confident as I create and engage in supportive, nurturing relationships. In this way, life becomes richer and sweeter.

Namaste, Cathleen L. Balfour